Bathrooms

You are probably thinking, do I really want to know about bathrooms in Korea? Better to be forewarned, I'd say. I had read about the revolution of bathrooms in Korea before I came. But now I see WHY they were wanting to change their perception of bathrooms. I have seen no evidence of reformation underway, such as a shift in perception to versatile, rest areas as one article encouraged.

Many times, the men and women use the same restroom. And usually there is a pair of flip flops available when you enter the restroom (at homes and restrooms and other locations where you are expected to remove your shoes before entering) so your socks don't get contaminated with urine and/or water (I wrote about how the showers never have shower curtains in a previous post, I believe).

The toilet paper is kept on one huge roll in the middle of the restroom, not in each individual stall. More often than not, you wish you had stashed some tissue in your pocket because either you forget to get it before you enter or the big roll is empty from lack of attention to the room or so many using it to dry their hands (more on this later). I find it strange that I need to know the quantity I will be using prior to doing so. I'm sure this must lead to both times when you feel "stranded", as well as times when you have way more than you need, and regret wasting some. Usually there are signs that request that you put your tissue in a basket, rather than flushing it. I have never seen one that says why. For instance, in California, where I am from, we occasionally have a shortage of water in the summer months and see similar signs on the walls of bathrooms because we are attempting to conserve water by keeping the number of flushes to a minimum. Or I've seen signs that say that the plumbing is sensitive so not flushing and causing an "explosion" is preferable to taking chances. But in Korea you receive no such information to inspire you to cooperate. This is true to Korean style, in my opinion. The general rule, from what I can tell as an outsider, is that communication, especially from those with more power, authority, or information than you, is not to be questioned and you are not told the reasoning behind any decisions made by such people because they are above reproach.

My Irish friend and neighbor, Katherine took a photo of one such sign. I laughed so hard I nearly wet my pants when she showed me the photo. She took the photo because it was so special. And yet we laughed for another reason entirely. We laughed because it was a huge realization for both of us. An understanding of something in the culture that we both had found annoying but we had not been able to put our finger on until that shared moment of laughter. A huge relief that finally we didn't each have to take things so personally. We could see the bigger picture and that it didn't have anything to do with either of us as individuals. Such freedom. And from signs in the bathroom. OK, I'll tell you what the sign said. I hope (but doubt) you will enjoy it as much as we, two foreigners who have been living and working in a strange new land far from home for only about 2 months. It said "Do not flush toilet paper in toilet (and included exclamation marks in unexpected and unpredictable places) It's your fault" Now, I'm chucking all over again. Did you get it? Blame is very popular here. Even before problems happen. So I'm grateful for that sign in the bathroom and that Katherine realized it's significance, even if at an unconscious level, because my it gave me back my innocence.

The women have small urinals (about a quarter of the size of a man's regular wall mounted version) that are embedded in the ground horizontally, over which they squat. Usually there is one stall that has a real, genuine toilet. At the elementary schools where I worked, the cleaning equipment, such as the mop and bucket, were stored in this stall as well, which made it challenging to use with ease and grace.

Most of the women's bathroom stalls are equipped with one of those "mini urinals" in the ground. Every time I see them I am reminded of how insignificant women are in this culture and how it's a mans world. Sometimes I even feel pissed just catching a glimpse of them.

I frequently tell myself that the Korean women probably get used to them since they have been using them their entire lives but that for me, having used "the real thing" my whole life, I will wait for the "real thing" to become available. Sometimes I even pray, while waiting in line, that the one that is available when I am next in the cue will not be one of those small urinals, but a real toilet. At least twice now in three months, there has been no other option and I have had to figure out how to aim well or get wet.

All this ritual stuff with leaving your shoes at the front door means that you need to put your shoes back on when you have to go to the bathroom. I find this a horrible waste of human resources and time. I also lament that I have become so conscious of what the bottom of my shoes encounter as I walk the town that I may never be able to wear shoes indoors after I return to the States.

There is one thing I am very grateful for about Korean bathrooms though. Just so you don't find this post too one sided. That is their availability. Very easy to find, even for me who is so new here. Nearly every big building has one for public usage. My apartment building had one (although this might have been due to the fact that I lived above a singing room).

More about Singing Rooms another time as I have yet to explore these well yet. Although I did read about them, in book on Korea culture, before I came here. There was a whole chapter called "Sing your way to success". That is how popular they are here. Having been awakened in the middle of the night by someone crooning at the top of their lungs on a microphone on more than one occasion, I know it is a phenomenon that occurs most frequently after midnight and I imagine after considerable consumption of alcohol as well.

One more complaint before I leave you to ponder whether braving the bathrooms in Korea is worth the adventure to visit or live here. They very rarely have paper towels in the bathrooms and just as infrequently hot water (only the really upscale places have these two things, as far as I can tell). On the half a dozen times I have been privileged enough to experience a bathroom so well equipped, I have breathed a sigh of relief as well as experienced a huge wave of gratitude run through my body. This gratitude is for having been blessed to be treated well in this regard for so many years and to have a chance to re-experience feeling cared for again before I die.

Koreans usually use toilet paper to dry their hands, as unbelievable as that is! Trust me, I know it's hard to believe but it's true. Also rarely, blow dryers are available for drying your hands. I find this outrageous, especially since it is freaking way below zero outside and that water is way more than just cold and if you have wet hands when you go out in that sort of weather, you can feel really miserable for some time. Or in my case, if you work for an after school program and therefore, the heat is turned off in the building 6 hours before you leave and the windows allow air to blow through them so much that you need to wear your winter wool coat while teaching, your hands might get so cold that you can't even write on the board with a marker. No wonder I couldn't get rid of my cough for over two months!

Oh, and soap. It most frequently is a big blue ball (oval in shape) and stuck on the end of a bent metal pole which is sticking out from the wall. It took me awhile to figure out that it was soap and that you wet your hands and then cup them over it and pull a few times to get it to transfer from the ball on the stick onto your hands. More often than not, though, there is no soap at all. Does all of this information leave you wondering why you would even bother washing your hands after using the bathroom? Well then, we are not too different. Which is why I now more clearly understand the little hand wipes which are customarily offered prior to meals.

Oh, just one more. In the US, we have no smoking signs in bathrooms to protect those who are allergic or offended by second hand smoke. Not in Korea. Smoking is permitted, and common, everywhere. So a trip to the bathroom could result it smelling like a smoker for hours or even days afterwards. But what can you do? When you gotta go, you gotta go!

Wishing you soap, paper towels, toilet paper, and hot water every time you need them,
Terri